Forgive us our debts,
As we forgive our debtors.
In the early morning stillness, the words echoed loudly in my soul. Forgive our debtors. Wait, I had to forgive her?
Because she owed me. . . big time. There was a commitment there, Lord. You know that. She made certain promises she didn’t keep. She has obligations to our relationship. She can’t just walk away from that.
I’m not the only one who feels that way either, God. I read that email out loud to David yesterday, remember? Am I crazy, or is this just plain WRONG? I asked him. And he agreed with me — just plain wrong.
So, there you have it. She totally owes me. I’m right, and she is wrong.
We forgive our debtors.
I could use some debt forgiveness, Lord. You know those bills on the desk over there, it would be great if the creditor would just call up and say, “Never mind. We don’t care about this any more. Just tear it up and go about your business and don’t give it another thought.” But, yeah, not gonna happen.
Wait, you want me to forgive my debtor? Just tear up my accounting of her failings and go about my business and not give it another thought? Not want her to give it another thought? Wow, where is the justice in that? Shouldn’t I want her to stew in it a little bit, to agonize over how much she hurt me, to feel guilty? Bare minimum, right? No?
Forgive me my debts as I forgive my debtors. Yikes, how did You forgive me, Lord, if not extravagantly, completely, over-abundantly? I certainly don’t deserve Your debt forgiveness. Honestly, You paid the penalty for all my debts and forgave me all of them, and I still keep going right back and racking up more debts every single day. And You still keep forgiving me, more than seventy times seven.
Forgive the debt. I have to forgive this one — and relatively small — debt compared to the whole pile of debts I’m going to need forgiveness for this morning. Including bitterness, anger, pettiness, ingratitude, and pride over this one incident.
Forgive me, Lord, and teach me to forgive my debtors.